


Room to Breathe

by lydiamartincan



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alpha Derek, Always Female Stiles Stilinski, Break Up, Canon up to season 2, F/M, Female Stiles Stilinski, How Do I Tag, pack abandons lydia and stiles, something is coming, what else is new in fan fiction
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-14
Updated: 2017-12-19
Packaged: 2019-02-14 19:34:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,688
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13014687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lydiamartincan/pseuds/lydiamartincan
Summary: Something is coming and Derek must do what he has to to protect the weakest in his pack. Even if that means losing them.





	1. The beginning

It started slowly. One at a time. First it was Issac. Then it was Vernon. Then Erica. So on and so forth. Of course he was last. Why wouldn't he be? They were dating after all. Even if it was only a few months it was something, right? He still kissed her when she asked and he still hugged her when she hugged him first. She even introduced him to her room mate as her boyfriend and he had nothing to say. Which was a red flag from the get go. Speaking of...

“Are you seriously breaking up with me over the phone, Derek Hale?” Stiles growled into the receiver. Was he serious right now? Over the phone? It was a little better than a text but he was really doing this right now? At noon on a Monday? When they hadn't even fought in days?

There was a long pause before a slightly strangled,

“Yes?” 

“Right. Fuck off.” She slammed her cell phone down on the table not even caring about her precious screen. Irene sat across from her, eyes wide and a lost expression on her face.

“Did Derek just-”

“Yes.” At least she sounded sure of it. This was the last nail in the coffin for Beacon Hills. As stated previously, it happened slowly. One by one the 'pack' stopped answering her calls. They stopped talking to her in the hallway during senior year and sure enough, she was blocked on facebook. She didn't even do anything! At least, not that she knew of. All of them. Gone. 

Well, all except one. Little miss Lydia Martin was apparently in the ex pack society as well. Jackson even started ignoring her. Jackson! Her fucking boyfriend too! Not to mention Scott. Stiles' best friend. The lady to her Bond. Or was it the other way around?

Either way this was it. Stiles was going to have to call Lydia and tell her. She'd finally been cut just like her. Oh, she'd definitely find this hilarious. Well, there went that pseudo family. On to the next one, right?

“Stiles? Are you ok?” Snapping from her angry thoughts she stared at her room mate across the library table. She hadn't even realized she was crying. Surely enough, here comes the 'All my friends left me what do I do' panic attack. This really was the last nail in the coffin. That was it. Derek was her last tie to the pack. He was the only one that would, albeit sometimes, answer her texts. Now what did she have? She was only away at college for a month. Not only that she was only three hours away. All she had left friends wise was Lydia, who went away to college in New York and Irene. Her room mate. Who was now helping some sophomore carry Stiles out of the library. 

“I'm fine, I'm fine.” She wheezed out, gripping Irene's shirt sleeve. 

“Are you sure?” The sophomore asked, hesitant to let her go. 

“I'll be fine.” 

 

```

“Ha! I knew those bastards would get you too! I told you. Magical creatures only club.” Lydia said sharply over the line. Stiles smiled bitterly for half a second.

“Yeah, you really showed me.” Sarcasm at its best.

“I'm sorry, hon. I know heart break sucks, but look at it this way; you still got to bang Derek Hale. I'd call that a victory.”

“Lydia! Come on!” Stiles covered her mouth to laugh. She was right, even if Stiles didn't want to admit it. “Will I ever find my handsome were wolf prince?” She feigned innocence, clutching at her chest.

“Not one like that.” Lydia said with a scoff. “How do you think I feel? I had freakin' Apollo!” Lydia chuckled lightly. There was a slight pause before she spoke again, more serious this time. “We can do this without them Stiles. We're not damsels in distress like they might think. We can still kick ass without a few pretty boys.” That pulled a real smile out of Stiles. Lydia was right, they could survive without some boys. They were women after all. The stronger of the sexes if you asked Stiles. 

“I know a few asses we could try to kick.” She said through clenched teeth. The pain was still there. She knew it was for Lydia too, even if she did her best not to show it. She, like Stiles lost all of her friends as well. She lost Allison, her best friend. 

“Look, Stiles, I know you're mad but...” Lydia sighed. “This was calculated in its execution, there's no doubt about that. Maybe they're doing it for a reason. We should just, back off.” She sounded so defeated and Stiles knew why. Lydia had fought with Jackson that night he broke up with her. She yelled about everyone ignoring them and how she felt like such a cast out. Jackson had only starred at her before whispering a quiet 'Go home, Lydia. You don't belong out here.' 

“No. You're right.” Stiles ran a hand down her face, moving away a few light tears. “It's over.” She sighed with Lydia before shaking her head as if clearing away those tainted thoughts. “So, how was your exam?”

 

```

“Are we really sure about this?” Erica asked from her spot on the couch, twisting a perfect golden lock around her index finger. 

“About what?” Allison asked, checking Lydia's twitter for the fifth time that night. 

“Abandoning them like this. It sucks losing friends.” Erica pouted, a familiar sting hitting her chest. 

“It's not abandoning if they don't run back.” Now it was Isaac. He glared at Allison's screen before she rolled her eyes.

“It's not a crime to look, Isaac.” She quipped, returning her phone to her jacket pocket.

“No, at this point its called stalking I think.” Boyd called out, a sad smile on his lips. Allison just shook her head, turning to Scott who was eerily quiet about the subject. Then again so was Jackson. And-

“If Deaton is right, its not safe for them. If this... thing is coming we have to be prepared. No loose ends.” Derek finally spoke up from his perch on the window sill. “No one who can't fend for themselves.” He stared at Allison for a long moment. 

“But they could! They know how to fight, you taught them! You taught all of us!” Scott yelled finally. He knew what a bad idea it was to raise your voice at an alpha but he couldn't take it anymore. He missed Stiles. He missed Lydia. He didn't understand why they couldn't help them fight. “Allison's a human too but you didn't make us drop her.” He shot his girl friend an apologetic look, he hoped she understood the point he was trying to make. She placed her hands on his, a silent gesture that she did. 

“Allison's a trained hunter. Not only that her ties to hunters might help us against whatever is coming.” Derek had an answer for everything. 

“That's another thing, we don't even know whats coming. All Deaton said was 'A great darkness is going to ascend, something is coming and its angry.'” Erica answered this time, staring at her alpha with the questioning look of a puppy.

“Is that not enough?” Derek asked the room. “Is something coming and angry not enough to worry you?”

Every one remained silent. The air was heavy with tension in the room and Scott continued to stare at Derek like daggers could shoot from his eyes. Mean while Allison's eyes fell on Jackson again. He was staring at the front door like he was debating on running out. She reached out over Scott and took his hand. 

“Are you ok, Jackson?” 

He shook her off before he stood. 

“Derek's right. We have to protect them.” That wasn't the answer Allison was expecting.


	2. Paralyzed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The mall is a very small place.

I do not want to do this.” Stiles groaned, flopping onto her bed unceremoniously. “Going home for the holidays is dreadful.” Karen laughed from her spot opposite the moaning woman. 

“Why do you go then?” Karen was Stile' senior year room mate. Irene hadn't worked out. Turns out she wasn't that crazy about Stiles' habits and ended up fighting with her three months into their time together. Not fun. 

Stiles went back for the holidays, of course, as much as she didn't want to her father insisted. Stiles hated the dodging through town between the pack avoiding her and very obviously running in the other direction. Dad always said they would do something just the two of them since usually holidays were spent with the Mc Calls; but he understood why that was no longer happening the last couple years. “People grow apart.” Was what he said. 

People get pushed aside, is what Stiles thought. Christmas was always nice though. They ate ham and watched classic movies her mother used to love. She didn't even yell at her Dad for falling asleep during Rudolph every year. It was a tradition. Just like Stiles eating herself into such a food coma she always ends up sick the next day. 

“Because I have to. My dad is crazy about holidays ever since my mom died. He says they're the most important time of the year.” Stiles shook her head and rolled her eyes a little. She loved her Father, she did. She just hated going home. She gets to spend spring break in New York with Lydia and over the summer she'd stay at school and work. But the holidays, she couldn't get away from them. No matter how hard she tried.

“It's only two weeks, I'm sure you'll be fine.” Karen stood up and grabbed her back pack. “I'll see you next year, Stiles.” 

Stiles waved as she left, sort of happy for the sudden silence. Now, she had time to think of her plan. Every year she hatched a brilliant plan on why she had to stay inside at all times during Christmas break. And this year she had nothing. Being sick didn't work, who's sick for two weeks? Fake injuries were out. She could tell him shes got too much homework, which was true. Just not two weeks worth. Maybe this year she'd just tell him the truth. 

Dad, I'm trying to avoid all of my ex friends please let me stay in doors for two weeks. 

Yeah, no reason that wouldn't work. The only solace she could find was that Lydia's parents were forcing her to come home this year as well. Lydia hadn't gone home since Christmas of freshman year. Finally, she'd have to suffer through it with Stiles. Maybe they could just never leave each others sides the whole time. Yeah, that could work. 

With a heavy sigh, Stiles picked up her duffle bag, locked up the room, and headed towards the parking lot. She had a three hour drive a head of her. In Holiday traffic. Great. Her shoulders slumped impossibly further down. “Fuck Christmas.” She whispered to herself, eyeing the ice beneath her feet. 

After a few slips, she was finally in the jeep. She gave the ignition a good twist and listened as the poor thing sputtered to life. 

“Good girl.” She smiled, patting the dash board a few times. Pulling a hair tie from her wrist she made quick work of pulling her hair up into a bun. She hadn't let it grow out much, at its longest point it was just below her chin. A hipster cut, Lydia had called it. Whatever, what did she know? Stiles was no pretentious hipster. She scoffed at the very idea. Much more preferable to call herself a geek. That was a little more fitting, she thought. 

Turning up the radio, she headed for the exit. She was ready for Christmas and she was ready to sleep in her own bed. What she isn't ready for is the awkward bump ins with the pack. Last Christmas eve she practically ran into Erica who beamed at her briefly before hurrying in the other direction, mumbling her sorry as she went. That had confused Stiles her entire trip. What were wolf walks into someone? Better yet, who smiles after bumping into someone before running off? What was that?

The year before that she ran into Allison down the feminine hygiene aisle in the pharmacy. That was even weirder. Allison had talked to her! It was a quick 'Hi, how are you?' As if she hadn't dropped Stiles like a dead fly. Stiles had to do all she could to stop from flipping off her former friend. 

The year before that she saw Isaac across the street of down town and he had just turned his nose up at her. That was more the response she expected. What would this year bring she couldn't help but wonder? 

 

```

By the time she got home her Dad already had breakfast cooked. Bacon and eggs. The smell beckoned Stiles inside and wrapped her in warmth. Coming home always gave her anxiety, but whenever she stepped into her child hood home... Well, it really was coming home to family. It felt like all of the pressure of college just melted off of her. Maybe coming home wasn't so bad. She hugged her father and they chatted for a few hours over coffee before he ended up needing to leave for patrol for a few hours. 

“I'll be home by 9!” He called out before disappearing out the front door. No sooner had it closed than it opened right back up.

“Bye, sheriff!” Lydia called, waving to Stile's father as he pulled out of the drive way. “I love your dad.” Smiling like a child in a candy store, Lydia strode right up to Stiles and wrapped her in her second hug for the day. “How are you? Hope you don't mind. My parents are such a snore.” Stiles hugged her best friend back furiously, practically shaking the girl. 

“I'm ok, a little nervous.” Stiles chuckled before letting her go. “What about you? How was the flight?” 

“It was good.” Lydia began, moving toward the still half full coffee machine and pouring herself a cup. “I finished my ten page thesis in the cab on the way here.” Lydia was majoring in languages and physics. How she managed both Stiles had no idea. Sometimes she was struggling with just a criminology major. 

“What was it on this time?” 

“The basic understanding of how Latin can help us better learn other dead languages like old norse.” Stiles faked a snore that her friend only smirked at. “Have you even started your paper?”

“Uh, no! I'm on vacation, Lyds.” Stiles expressed, arms wide open as if to emphasize her location. Lydia laughed before shaking her head. 

“You only have two weeks.”

“Yeah, don't remind me.” Rolling her eyes, Stiles turned to look at the time. It was barely noon. “Sometimes I forget how boring it is here.” Beacon hills wasn't like the hustle and bustle of a college town. There was one mall and one movie theater in town and not much to do other than that. Well, unless you liked hiking. Stiles definitely did not like hiking. Not in these woods. Lydia nodded, a sympathetic look playing on her features. 

“I have to finish christmas shopping. That's why I came here actually, I wanted to see if you wanted to go with me.” Flipping her fiery hair over her shoulder, Lydia almost challenged Stiles to say no. After all, what was Stiles doing?

Stiles froze for a moment. She was just complaining about how bored she was but did she really want to tempt fate by going outside? To the mall none the less, at the end of December. She groaned then flopped her head onto the table with a thud, rattling the coffee mugs.

“I guess.” At least they'd be together. If they ran into anyone Stiles knew Lydia wouldn't be afraid to say something. “Who are you shopping for?”

 

```

 

A few hours later found the two friends wandering the crowded alleys of the local Mall. Lydia had made their first stop one of the only high end stores in the mall. She bought her mother a $500 bag that Stiles oogled at for about a half hour. It was all for looks though, Stiles knew the tension between Lydia and her mother was sometimes a little too much. They got along swimmingly, every time Stiles was there but she knew Lydia felt this pressure to live up to her mother. It was worse in high school but sometimes Stiles wondered if Lydia was still struggling. She never liked to talk about the bad things. 

“No, wrapping presents isn't hard, you just cant figure it out.”

“No, wrapping anything other than a box is hard. How are you going to wrap that pocket book?”

“I'm not, Stiles. I'm putting it in a gift bag. Honestly.”

The brunette rolled her eyes skyward praying for an anvil to drop on her. Wrapping presents was hard! You had to take in the dimensions of the object and you had to flip it and do math and Stiles really wasn't about that. Not that she couldn't do math. She could, very well. It's just when presented with a cube and flat paper she got a little confused. Especially when it wasn't a cube. Wrapping an amazon box was nothing, anything else? Stiles was lost. Gift bags were her best friend, she rarely ever wrapped anything.

“I know what a gift bag is, Lydia.”

“Yeah, you always give me my gift in one. Last time you gave me one of my textbooks in a gift bag.” Lydia side eyed her like she was some kind of judgey judge. 

“Listen, I just wont get you anything this year.” She quipped back, feigning disinterest at her friends look of horror. Lydia lightly punched her arm before laughing. 

“You wouldn't, I know you bought my gift back in August.” Damnit! Why did Stiles ever tell her that?

“You suck.” Was all she had. Lydia just laughed harder. 

They continued to wander and window shop while Lydia contemplated the perfect book for her aunt. Apparently her aunt wasn't as materialistic as the rest of Lydia's family so shopping for her was a little harder. 

“She's really into the occult.” Lydia began, passing a new age shop. Stiles faked a gag, which had Lydia chuckling behind her hand. “Just one second, come on.” The strawberry blonde grabbed onto her friends arm, pulling her into the shop with a little too much force. 

Of course the world hated them. Why, you ask? Oh, only because who was standing at the front counter. Scott and Allison. 

All four froze at the same time, well Scott looked like a deer caught in head lights before Stiles even noticed him. He was looking between them like he was scared. That hurt Stiles more than anything. She really wished that anvil would drop down right about now. She felt paralyzed by their gazes.

“Hi, Lydia. Hi, Stiles.” Allison offered first, a gentle smile on her lips. It made Stiles sick to her stomach. 

“Good afternoon, Allison. Scott.” Lydia started, keeping it very professional, her mouth twisted into a harsh line. “How are you?” She crossed her arms, subconsciously maybe. 

“We're good.” Allison answered, smile wavering slightly. “How are you guys? Hows school in New York?” There was a long pause and Stiles could see the obvious hurt in her friends eyes. What was Allison playing at being so friendly to them? What game was this?

“We're fine. Thanks for asking.” Stiles answered, placing a hand on her friends shoulder. 

“New York is nice. You guys should visit if you ever decide to get out of this hell hole.” Lydia barely kept from spitting out the words with venom like a cobra. “Excuse us.” She gripped Stiles' hand before dragging her from the store. They hadn't even gotten the chance to look around. Stiles chanced a look back and saw Scott watching them leave. 

"What was that?" She asked.

"Weird." Was the only response Lydia gave. "Lets go eat, we'll go back there later."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As per last time, constructive criticism is always welcome. 
> 
> Sorry if the story feels a bit rushed, I'm trying to get back into the swing of writing. Thank you for reading.


	3. The First Attack

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How is Stiles supposed to process seeing him after four years? Not only that how is she supposed to process an attack!?

That night, Stiles stared at the full moon through her window. She glared at it like it was to blame for all of her problems. Pulling up both middle fingers, she did a little dance in front of the window, mentally telling the moon to go fuck its self. Classy. 

The moon had nothing to do with this she knows. The moon didn't wish these creatures into the world, nor did the moon tempt her friends to drop her. That was all their own doing. Still, she couldn't help but re call the memories of past full moons, watching the pack shift and run together through the woods while the three humans sat back to always call them home. Those were simpler and dangerous times. She supposed she should be thankful actually, she wasn't in mortal danger every few months anymore. Maybe this was a blessing in disguise. 

Shaking her head, Stiles moved from the window and headed to the bathroom. She eyed the wine cabinet down at the bottom of the stairs. She was twenty two, she was allowed. She never expect to run into Scott, let alone the first day of being back. What terrible luck, she thought with a sigh.

Bypassing the bathroom all together, Stiles headed down stairs. Plucking a bottle from the cabinet, she eyed the label suspiciously. It was a bottle of white zin she had left from last year. Did wine go bad? It was sweet wine, the only kind she liked. With a shrug, she pushed away her suspicion and went to pour a rather large glass. 

Back in the bathroom, she began to run a bath. A bath, a glass of wine, and a copy of the latest batman. It was just the night she needed. She let out a very weighted heave of a sigh before shedding her clothing. She sipped the glass while testing the water with her hand. Luke warm, welcome home. The pipes here were always a bitch in the winter. Stiles turned the nozzle as far as it would go to get the hottest water the pipes could give before she settled into the tub. Letting out a relaxed deep breath she finally felt herself melting into the water. 

The wine didn't taste awful, but it was definitely better chilled. She pouted before picking up her comic. Finally able to relax her mind reflected on the events of the day. She remembered how Allison's smile had wavered at Lydia's hostility. Maybe the separation was hard on her too? Then why do it? Scott hadn't said a word. He just stood there staring at Stiles. His look was guarded but all to open at the same time. Almost like he was waiting for her to say something to him. Anything. But she didn't. She had been a coward and just tried to rush through the conversation. She hadn't even given him a chance. 

“Oh, hell.” Stiles bemoaned, rubbing her hands down her face. Quickly, she downed the large glass and proceeded to lay back in the water and close her eyes. How was she supposed to process all this? 

There she sat in the tub for about a half hour before the wine began to warm her from the inside. Lost in her thoughts she barely heard the rustling and dog howling outside. It relaxed the stubborn muscles and made her eyes heavy. Pulling herself up, she wrapped a towel around herself, drained the tub, and began to dry off. She stared at herself in the mirror for a few minutes, taking in the changes since her teenage years. Her chest had barely filled out, but her hips had come in nicely. Her butt was a little flat but her face was more chiseled. The freckles and moles remained, but her lashes were thicker and darker. Her hair was slightly frizzed from the bath but it was nothing a little oil couldn't fix.

She eyed her pajamas, simple black and red flannel pants and a white tank top and wondered if she'd be warm enough for the night. Shrugging at the thought she quickly changed before walking out of the bathroom and down the stairs again. She poured herself a second glass before quickly downing that one as well. Her face scrunched up at the bitter taste. The warmth it provided down her throat and into her abdomen made it all worth it. She wasn't a big wine drinker, but she wouldn't touch her dads whiskey stash. Not around this time of year. 

Just as she was about to pour a third, there was a thud from upstairs. It was barely eight, her Father wasn't home yet. 

“What the--?” She wondered aloud before, hurrying up the stairs. A cold sense of danger washed over her as she rounded the corner to her bedroom. Sitting in the dark below the now open window was a black figure. Out of instinct she was about to yell at Derek for not using the front door when a chill raced down her spine. 

“Who-?” The thing lunged at her, talon like fingers reaching out for her throat. She let out a scream and fell back into her closet door, cornered. Her hands grasped for anything behind her, praying for a lacrosse stick or old bat. All her hands could find were miscellaneous items on a high up shelf. She threw the figurines and books at the figure before it lunged again. 

All at once she felt her side slam into the wall, as she felt arms encircle her waist. She looked up in time to see a flash of red before the presence was gone and the... creature was shrieking. A lot. 

Stiles turned to watch as Derek grabbed the thing by its shoulders and threw it against the far wall. It stood back up almost immediately and turned on him. Quickly Derek was able to counter and grab the things arm, digging his claws into the black flesh. He reared back before grabbing the thing with both hands and throwing it out the still open window. The thing screamed on its way out, what even does that?

Instinctively she took a step forward before stopping herself. Derek watched the thing drop before turning to Stiles. He seemed to stare at her, wolf features out, as if he was sizing her up. Huffing out a breath, he said,

“Don't follow it, Stiles.” Before he too was jumping out the window in hot pursuit. 

“Wait!” She called out rushing to the window. She looked out into the darkness, blind. Stiles was fast, grabbing a pair of shoes and rushing down the stairs and out the door. Running out into the street, she looked left and right, up, behind her, there was nothing. 

What was that thing? Why did it come into her room? Why did Derek save her? What did this all mean?!

She yelled out an angered noise before turning and stomping into the house. Upstairs she could hear her phone ringing. Swiftly she moved up the stairs, a false sense of hope nagging at her at who was calling. 

“Hello?”

“Stiles! Are you ok!?” It was only Lydia.

“What?” Stunned, she asked. How did Lydia know? “I- what? How did you? Yeah, I'm fine.” She rubbed the back of her neck, feeling the stress knots returning already, even through the wine. “Derek was just here! Some _thing_ just attacked me!”

“Oh my God...” Lydia trailed off, like she didn't believe it. 

“How did you know?” Stiles asked again. 

“I didn't. I just. I got this feeling like I needed to call you. I needed to make sure you were safe.” Her friend answered, sounding as dazed and confused as Stiles felt. “Are you sure you're ok? Do you want to come over?" A brief pause. "It might be safer.”

Stiles contemplated the offer for a second, striding over to her window and looking out into the darkness again. Out across the street, in the bushes she could see the familiar glow of yellow eyes staring at her. That was even weirder. Why station someone to watch her if they didn't care?

“No, I think I'll be ok.” Answering finally, she reached up and slammed the window down. This time making sure to lock it. 

“Are you sure?” Lydia asked over the phone, Stiles could practically hear her thinking. 

“Yeah, my Dad will be home soon anyway. Don't worry about me, Lyds. Just. Lock all your windows, ok?” It was bad enough that thing came after her. What if it was to come after Lydia as well? Would Derek rush to save her too? He was the alpha, but they weren't pack. Why bother saving them in the first place?

“Ok. Derek. Did he say anything?” Lydia was probing now. She had every right too, Stiles did the same thing to her when Jackson left her. Stiles laughed bitterly, sitting on the edge of her bed.

“He told me not to follow it.” She spat out. “The thing tries to kill me and he's still lecturing me.”

“Typical man behavior.” Lydia said flippantly. “Well. That's enough awkward encounters for one day. Are you sure you're ok?”

Stiles thought about it for a moment. Was she? She hadn't been in danger like that in four years. Her hands began to shake a little, but she remembered the eyes she saw outside. She didn't know who it was, but she prayed they could fight like Derek or Jackson. Speaking of, it had been four years since she had seen him. Four years and he had saved her life. It still didn't make sense to her. Not only that, but right after he spoke to her in such a cold way. Why save someone to be like that? Dying is pretty permanent. Maybe he felt obligated.

“Stiles?”

“I'm fine, Lydia. Nothing we haven't dealt with before.” She wasn't lying, really. “I think I'm going to go to bed. Good night.”

“Alright. Call me if anything happens. Night.” Stiles dropped her phone into the pocket of her flannel pants before rubbing at her neck again. What did any of this mean? Moving downstairs she grabbed the bottle of wine and just sat in front of the tv watching reruns of Friends. 

Allison had tried to speak to her again, of course it was only when needed when they ran into each other. Maybe she was just being civil? But then why be hurt at their disapproval? It's also possible Derek was just in pursuit of the creature and it just so happened to find Stiles' window. It wasn't like she was being targeted or something. Then why leave a patrol? This was confusing. 

Just as Ross was about to say Rachel's name at his wedding her Father walked in the door. 

“Hey, kid.” He eyed the bottle suspiciously. 

“Hey. Long day.” She remarked taking a swig. The sheriff chuckled before removing his coat and walking toward the kitchen. He returned with a bottle of whiskey and two glasses. He handed one to stiles remarking _'We have cups you know'_. Stiles chuckled before accepting it and pouring the wine. 

“So, Miss. Nurskuit had a slip and fall today. Apparently Tony Ramirez didn't salt his walk way.” Her dad sat next to her looking at the tv and sipping at his drink. She missed this. Just hanging out with her dad, watching tv talking about town gossip. It was comfortable and familiar. It was being home. Sometimes she really missed being home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, constructive criticism is welcome. 
> 
> I'm actually pretty happy with this chapter. Thoughts?


	4. A group decision

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Derek's the alpha, for Christ's sake why does everyone always seem to forget that?

“They could help us!” Scott cried out to his alpha, pleading to keep his friends safe. “You said it yourself, no one can research like the two of them and we need that. We have no idea what we're up against, Derek.” Derek turned to glare at the beta, eyes flashing red for a brief moment. He knew Scott was right. These creatures kept coming up every night and they had no idea what they were, no idea how they got there. Have they been here for years, waiting? Or was something summoning them? They had no leads, no idea, and Deaton was working around the clock. 

“I never did agree with your plan, you know.” The emissary spoke up helpfully. Derek only shot him a glare as well. He was the alpha, he chose what was best for his pack and if that meant cutting ties then so be it. The three men stood around an examination table in the back of the animal clinic. Scott had been working with Deaton when Derek came by for advice. He couldn't understand why that creature had gone right for Stiles. As far as it knew she meant nothing to the pack, so why target her?

“I never asked for anyone's opinion.” 

“That's the problem! You might be our alpha but were all pack. We should all get a say in freaking excommunicating people.” Scott crossed his arms, cocking his head to the side in question. He was either about to get his ass handed to him or a pat on the back. 

“Clearly, you don't understand the term alpha.” Sarcasm, so he was about to get his ass beat. “Besides, do you really think they'll want to help us after four years? Stiles couldn't even look at you yesterday. You said it yourself, Scott.” Derek wasn't wrong, Scott had told him about how he and Allison had ran into both Lydia and Stiles. It pained Scott to think about it still, his once best friend couldn't even stand to look at him. The persistent hurt in her eyes had torn him up inside. He had done that to her.

“You did this! You're the reason they hate us!” Scott bellowed, earning another death glare from his alpha. He felt it. The urge to cower down in fear against him, but he pushed on. He had courage this time and he wasn't going to back down. “You chose to do this to them, and the rest of us had no choice. Stiles and Lydia were like my sisters and you took that from all of us. You broke our pack.” Oops, a little too far. 

This time Derek wasn't glaring at him, he wasn't raging like any other alpha would at the blatant disrespect. He was just... staring. Staring at the far off wall like it could provide him with all the answers he needed. Derek knew what he had done long before any of the others had even protested. He stole away two of the packs members, pushed them aside like play things. He had disrupted the flow of his pack and they could all feel it, it reflected in the way they fought. They would leave obvious openings, openings that were once filled with chatter and red hair. He hadn't broken the pack, no far from it. But it was fractured and that was enough to drive his betas mad some days. 

“You think I don't know that?” The once fearsome alpha began, shoulders slumping slightly. He looked to Scott with false calm in his eyes. “You think I don't know what I've done, Scott? I'm not blind, I can see what this is doing to all of you. Even now.” But what was he supposed to do? Whats done is done, how can he change the past? 

“Then fix it.” Scott demanded, tears brimming in his golden eyes. He wanted his best friend back. 

“I don't know how.” 

“Often times, I find apologies to work.” Deaton provided, arms crossed against his broad chest. How do you apologize to somebody you just dropped? How do they go about confronting the two girls who seemed so hostile only yesterday? Lydia had nearly bit off Allison's head, how was an apology going to make up for something like four years of radio silence? “You could get them a gift. Something to show how truly sorry you all are.” The emissary said, sensing the discomfort in the room.

“A gift?” Derek scoffed. “Yeah, I'm sure they'll be real appreciative after what we've-- I've done.” he had to stop himself. Scott was right, this was all Derek's fault. He had gotten cocky, too reliant on brute strength to remember sometimes you needed a humans touch. Someone to read through the books and spells while the wolves did most of the fighting. He wanted to protect them so bad he pushed them away and now they were all suffering. What had he done? 

He was at war with himself. The alpha in him wanted to keep them away, keep pushing until they never came home again. He wanted to keep them so far away that maybe his pack would just forget. The human in him, however, waged a different battle. It wanted to pull them back, hold onto the two humans so tightly they could never run again. Inside he could still feel the pull of their hold on the pack. Derek could still feel the strings tying them all together. Which side of himself was right? Which side did he trust more?

“I think its a great idea.” Scott smiled at Deaton, bright and ready. “Lydia loves make up, and Stiles loves comics. We can get them something like that for christmas and have a dinner. Maybe they'll come!” 

_Wishful thinking._ Derek's mind supplied. He wasn't as sold on the idea as his beta. He knew Stiles, knew how stubborn she was. If she was set on never wanting to see him again she wouldn't show up. Hell, she probably wont even answer his call. How were they supposed to convince two stubborn humans to come back to the pack that abandoned them in such vulnerable times? This wasn't going to be easy.

“Allison and I can go shopping! I think you and Jackson should go.” Derek's head snapped at that, he turned his head so fast he felt a little dizzy even. 

“What?” He bit out. 

“You're the ones they're probably the most angry at. If Stiles can get over seeing you, I'm sure she'll be fine. Lydia too.” 

“I second Scott's idea. It might seem a little political, but he's right.” Great. Now it was 2-1. God, Derek wished now more than ever he had brought Erica along with him. He wanted the floor to swallow him up whole. Stiles was one of the last people he wanted to see again, the confused sadness in her eyes he had seen nearly drove him crazy. She had looked so frightened in the face of that creature. Derek hadn't seen her so terrified since their first few encounters with the alpha. She had changed so much and he had missed it all. She was scared when she used to be brave and he had done that to her. 

He really did not want to do this. 

“Scott-” 

“We need to figure this out. These creatures keep coming in bigger numbers, soon they'll be too great for even you to take on, Derek. We could use the help.” Deaton sighed, shoulders dropping as he spoke. “I fear that time might be coming sooner then we think.” 

“They're out of practice.” Derek argued. 

“So we teach them.”

“What if they say no?”

“We persist.”

“What if I say no?”

That got a pause. He was the alpha after all, everyone seemed to keep forgetting that. 

“Are you?” Scott asked, dropping his hands to the exam table they stood around. 

Derek thought for a minute. He could say no, put an end to this once and for all. What would that mean though? Death for his pack? Another four years or more of Stiles coming home for the holidays and using every ounce of his energy to avoid her? Another four years of uncertainty and angry betas? Derek took in a deep breath, closing his eyes and furrowing his brows. 

“I guess I'm not.”

**Author's Note:**

> constructive criticism welcomed. 
> 
> Named after Room To Breathe by You Me At Six


End file.
